Paul Biya to Support Tech Founders with FCFA 20bn in Grants

Do you remember when President addressed the Cameroonian youths on the 10th of February 2016? Do your remember how he addressed us as ‘The Andriod Generation’?

Now things are coming out so beautifully.

In a communique passed out by the president of Cameroon, three days ago, he said he wants to fully support the tech founders. He will be giving money in 3 different categories.

  1. New ideas that have not yet been established will receive 4 million FRS each
  2. Startups that are in motion and have been existing for less that 5 years will each receive 40 million FRS
  3. Startups that have been existing for over 5 years will each receive 200 million FRS

Paul Biya discovered that the Minister of Post and Telecommunications misused the last money he took to reach out to the tech founders. He learnt from his super tech-consuming daughter, , that the wrong audience was attracted to the conference and so much money was wasted in logistics and food whereas no tech startup benefited. It is on this note that Paul Biya officially requires Brenda Biya to handle this mission alongside two other tech founders, one from Buea and one from Douala. Brenda will be representing Yaounde and the tech consumer community.

Now, here’s the flow.

To be one of the founders working with Brenda Biya, you need to participate in an audition. She requires working with 2 males, no females. The audition will take place exclusively on Snapchat but all applications must be sent to her Whatsapp Number.

  • All Applicants must send their names and the name of the startups they have founded.
  • Applicants must have a Whatsapp profile and their Whatsapp DP must be an awesome shirtless picture. If your DP is not a shirtless, then submit 2 shirtless pictures.
  • All applicants must have it mind that she has no ulterior motives. If you don’t have that in mind, you cannot emerge the winner.
  • The number will be provided in between the lines before the end of this article. So keep reading!

The process of selecting the winner is simple:

  1. She saves the numbers of applicants in her phones
  2. She goes over to Whatsapp and searches for their names. This is to see if they have Whatsapp accounts.
  3. She checks on their profile pics to verify the next step of eligibility.

N.B. It is possible that after looking at the DPs (Display Pictures) there could be a clear winner. However, the Snapchat video auditions will still happen and the judges will be Brenda and a few of her Beverly Hills friends.

Once she has her two winners, they will vet the list of startups and founders and select the persons worthy enough to receive these grants. All happenings will take place in a presidential suite at Hilton Hotel, Yaounde. My boys, stop thinking you’ll go to Beverly Hills. You can’t afford to pay $400 for a cab drive.

For a more important , the president is calling for innovative founders to rise against Boko Haram. He is offering a grant of 500 million FRS each to startups who will pitch during a demo day at the Ministry of Defense on the upcoming Labour Day (1st of May 2016). Interested in joining the battle against Boko Haram? just submit your email here.

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Stay tuned for upcoming details, and don’t get fooled, this might not be an April Fool. By the way, here’s the number for interested candidates: +237 661468896.

Signed, Biya’s personal secretary responsible for Chantal Biya’s Tech Foundation.

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