Apart from infidelity, there are other things that can silently put a marriage asunder. “Marriage has never been a bed of roses” mothers always say this to their daughters. Humans are complex beings who vary in perception, culture, beliefs, preferences and goals. Below, marriage therapists share six behaviors that can silently kill a marriage.
You Don’t Maintain Friendship Outside Your Mariage:
Maintaining friendship out of your marriage isn’t a bad idea at all. We had had close friends and classmates before getting into the marital union. Maintaining these old friends will do you more good as this fulfils all your socialisation needs and creates a networking opportunity. It’s paramount for couples to build and sustain a friendship with others. Through your friends, you can gain other experiences, perspectives and support that may actually enhance your relationship. You have to have confidants outside the relationship.”
You Underestimate the Need for Touch:
Don’t allow touch deprivation to creep your marriage. There is a dire need for a sexual connection between spouse and touch is good at that. Research shows the many health benefits, improved attitude, and feelings of connection that are brought on by a simple physical touch. In this case, partners must not evade from the touch culture as it may sparkle and enlighten their relationship. I am not suggesting you touch your partner all the time because at certain instances he/she might not be in that mood. A sensual touch can ignite the passion in your marriage you may have literally lost touch with. Exploit those beautiful bodies. Ladies, touch him and let him touch you
Your Couples Friends are a Bad Influence
This is a subjective statement. Bad company destroys character we all know that. If your spouse keeps friends that don’t add value to their lives then trust me they shall soon be influenced negatively. “Surrounding yourself with the wrong type of friends could negatively affect the health of your relationship,” said Laura Heck. Your friend’s actions are actively influencing your marriage, whether you realise it or not. I think couples should be intentional when confiding to their inner circle of friends and be mindful how these relationships influence their mindset for better or for worse.i
You Don’t Help Clean Up Around the House
Assisting your spouse executing housework is quiet romantic, many couples testify. Household duties are not just for the women as it is in Africa where men are kings. The men sit in the living room reading newspaper or watching the news while the woman labours in the kitchen alone. Gone in those days! In fact, a 2015 study from the University of Alberta found that couples who didn’t split chores had less relationship satisfaction and less sex than couples who divvied up their chores.Women are happier with their marriages if they see eye-to-eye with their husbands when it comes to splitting up the chores equally.
You Don’t sit Down and Talk about your Relationship:
Hey, babe how was your day? what did you eat? All these routine checks do well in keeping a healthy relationship. Communication plays a pivotal role in every relationship and makes love last. Having intentional conversations about your relationship means asking deeper, more open-ended questions: ‘What did we do well at as a couple today?’ ‘What is something I did today to contribute to our relationship?’ ‘What is something I can do for you?’ ‘When did you feel the most connected with or loved by me today? Couples need to create time once a week to talk about their relationship, this will help them to discover certain aspects of their love lives and solve problems.